It’s 4:33am and I’m up staring at the ceiling and silently thanking God that no one around me is up. It’s so quiet it’s almost magical. No people are talking, no birds are chirping, no lights are shining, thieves are probably retiring to bed after a hard night’s work and soon the darkness will too. That’s the sad part, that moments like these will not last forever, that I’ll probably have to wake up tommorow and be nice to people. Maybe I should just avoid waking up tommorow?
I love the world like this. Quiet. The serenity of it all brings along a certain kind of peace that I’m sure will be destroyed by the first break of light. Tommorow I will wake up and have to face another day of noise. Tommorow I will wake up and be forced to smile, nod and say ‘I’m great! Thanks!’ Tommorow I will wake up and be forced to open the door and let them in. I honestly don’t want to. I’m praying to the heavens that they let me have this piece of magic for just a while longer.
I don’t want to close my eyes and open them to the harsh realities of the world. Not today atleast. I want the world to remain asleep because in it’s sleepy state, I can keep my PMS under control. People will wake up today and want to talk to me or look at me or smile at me and I will hate it. I’ll hate their eyes and their teeth, probably their clothes and please don’t let me look at their face.
I’ll hate how nice they want to be and I’ll hate that I hate how nice they are because I’ll hate how nice I’ll have to pretend I am. Then, I’ll have to pretend that I’m happy with seeing their face when half that time all I want to do is punch them and smile. Is that legal?
When I started this post, I wanted to describe the beauty of 4a.m but then I remembered that after 4 am, all that beauty will fade away. Just like the good boys and all the world will be left with are a couple of dumb boys and alot of noise! I hate noise except when I’m making it.
The thing about noise is that it’s loud and it’s eerie and it kills your zone. It’s like having a perfectly good meditation session ruined by a mosquito that won’t stop buzzing. Mosquitos buzz right? I would google it but it’s already 4:53 am and I don’t want to. I hate noise, except when I’m making it.
I’m particularly mad at nothing at the moment. I don’t like my phone, I don’t like my bed, I don’t like my face so trust me I’ll hate your face, I don’t like my boyfriend I’m planning to be mad at him for nothing all week- poor lad, I don’t like my towel either- I just noticed that it’s so green and so is my purse and my dustbin and my shirt and my stand wait, am I trying to tell myself something? I thought purple was my favorite color! I hate you green!
I hate that my neigbour just came in from a night out. Who knew doors could be that loud? Now I hate that he’s using the toilet loudly, I mean would it kill you to flush the flush thing when it’s after 7 am and everybody is flushing the flush thing? My neighbours are really nice though. Thank God they aren’t green. I once saw green neighbours- literally green.
I hate that I can’t go to the supermarket and buy myself a big calorie filled icecream with Chilli Lemon crisps as toppings. I hate that we have to say crisps instead of crips. Life would be so much easier if crisps were actually crips right?
I hate that I just said that and now some dumb dumb will steal my crisps topping idea. I hate that instead of deleting that part, all I want to do is complain.
5:02 am. The magic is already dead. All my insecurities are beginning to surface like how 30 seconds ago I just spelt the word surface as sufface and how I probably have no data and how no one seems to have left their hotspots on tonight. Dumb babies.
Another thing bothering me is that tommorow I might go to the supermarket and find all the Neopolitan gone. I don’t know why but in my head, I already pictured an attack where the thieves solely steal all the Neopolitan Iceream and drive away in an icecream van with Tyga.I promise this has nothing to do with the song Icecream man.
Have I ever told you that I sometimes have OCD? Is OCD even a sometimes thing? Well let’s just say that I am a mad cleaner. This means that each and every time I’m angry the only thing that makes me feel better is cleaning and growing mad at people for no reason at all. I’m probably mad at you right now. Yeah you, reading this….
I clean everything! Once, I was so angry I accidentally cleaned my cat and cats do not like water. Which reminds me that my cat just gave birth and it’s already 5:12 am and I’m going to clean the house then sleep before anyone is awake and they make me kill them 🙂
I hope you have a terrible day and remember people say sharing is caring but in real sense, they just want your money or food. All I want you to do is educate someone because I promise that this post has a really important message about something that I’m yet to figure out.
Okay, Bye 🙂