I’ve been staring at my dark ceiling for the past 30 seconds trying to imagine how dreadfully amazing and pathetically beautiful this week is going to be. It’s 1:32am Sunday February 7th 2016. It’s officially 7 Days to Love. Or if you like cliche Valentines.
I’m trying to think of my past Valentines experiences and it’s so amazing because wait, I have none👻.
The only romantic walks I have had were me and some Vanilla flavoured yoghurt or some Neopolitan Icecream walking out of the supermarche.(Sounds way better in French) Somehow my two loves (That’s right I’m a player 😎) have always managed to render me speechless as to how happiness can be extracted from the smallest of cans. Go Valentines and yoghurt and Icecream. 😻
This piece of work is for my people. By my people I mean the people probably sitting in the dark right now thinking of how happily crappy and disgustingly sweet this whole week will be. From the unbearable valentine memes, to the annoying forwaded love messages to everyone on your contact list (apart from the cool kids) suddenly going Santa’s suit on you and that annoying guy from door number 3 still trying to get you. God Bless My People.
So my dear people I made a list of what to do on the 7 days to love.
Be grumpy. You have no valentines date. Wait im kidding. No, false alarm, I’m being real.:'(
Get over it, you’re probably alone the rest of the year too. 😸
Psychologically prepare thy self for the reign of ridiculous red that is about to befall the universe. Buying some cool shades should do the trick. The world is darker in shades. Just how we like it.😎
Ignore the Valentines request from that guy in door number 3 who has been trying to close since before you met. Please blacklist the guy at the shop who always gives you some free airtime and a wink.💀
Don’t forget the weird kid whose always calling to see ‘if you need anything’. He’s going to need something. Bye Kid.✌
Go movie hunting. A little bit of Jason Stratham, Seth Rogen and Chris Hemsworth wouldn’t kill you. 😁
Sleeping at insane hours on this day should be a law. Somehow this makes me want to be President someday.💃
Pray hard before you sleep. The Cupid is coming in strong. Easter Bunnies and Santa are more fun than cupid. He’s so choosy.💘
Call your mom and make her happy that you have no boyfriend/girlfriend disturbing you as you study.That little fact might earn you an extra hundred with three zeros.💰
Hang up and get yourself some Neopolitan. Please dont upload any pictures saying you are your own valentines. Now that’s just sad. 🔫
With that. You’ll barely notice the week pass by. Or not. This could be my sleep writing.
My picture is so irrelevant for this piece but it stays just because.
x Sleeping x